Everybody’s favourite co-commentator at the World Cup, really is a fun guy. No, really. Watch the video for evidence…

Robert Peston, Alan Hansen
The love children of Charlie Manson
Hansen is as Hansen does
Time and time again because
He’s got Charlie Manson’s eyes

Captain Scarlet in disguise
Look in the eyes
It’s not accidental
Staring scary eyes
They’re mental

Who’s that saying, ‘Get Torres on!’
Oh fuck it’s Mark Lawrenson
He’s also Charlie Manson’s son
The horribly unfunny one

They’ve discovered Higgs Boson
Over to Mark Lawrenson
Watching the header on collide
The God particle’s clearly offside

Fun fun fun
Mark Lawrenson

Dancing at the disco
with the procurator fiscal
Time to blow the final whistle on
Mark Lawrenson