Originally written about David Cameron’s refusal to debate with Alex Salmond years ago and then when Theresa was too feart to debate with Nicola Sturgeon.

 

The BBC they said to me
Why do you want to split Team GB?
Come make amends
Can’t we just be friends?
I said, Of course but it all depends
On David C
Dear BBC
Bring me his head to debate on TV
He made a fuss on Mount Olympus
So why won’t he come up here to face us?

Cos he’s a

Feartie, feartie
We all agree
Let’s have a square go – just you and me
Feartie, feartie, feartie, feartie
You say non non and I say oui oui

You can’t tell me the economy
Is safer in your hands than John Swinney’s
Gideon says the union works best
If you do what we want you to do yes
We run the show, so just you say no
We’ll drift along in the status quo
We are all sound using the pound
Dragging us under windswept and drowned

from the album Ziggy Sturgeon and The Spiders From Katie Melua’s Ears