Haggis Bombs

 

Haggis songs in Caledonia,
There’s only one by Rabbie Burns.
Fair fa’ your honest, sonsie face,
Great chieftain o’ the puddin-race!
Aboon them a’ ye tak your place,
Painch, tripe, or thairm.
Weel are ye wordy o’ a grace
As lang’s my arm, just don’t hit my face with

Haggis bombs; you can fling them at Burns suppers
Neeps and tatties, oh ma sticky hauns
Haggis bombs; you can fling them at Burns suppers
Neeps and tatties, oh ma sticky hauns

The groaning trencher there ye fill,
Your hurdies like a distant hill.
Your pin wad help,
to mend a mill
In time o’ need, While thro’ your pores the dews distil
Like amber bead. His knife see rustic
An’ cut you up wi’ ready sleight,
Haggis bombs shatter the hotels.
My Love is Like a Red, red Rose was nipped in the bud.

Haggis bombs; you can fling them at Burns suppers
Neeps and tatties, oh ma sticky hauns
Haggis bombs; you can fling them at Burns suppers
Neeps and tatties, oh ma sticky hauns

Trenching your gushing entrails bright,
Like ony ditch; And then, O what a glorious sight,
Warm-reekin, rich!
Then, horn for horn, they stretch an’ strive:
Deil tak the hindmost! on they drive,
Till a’ their weel-swall’d kytes belyve,
Are bent lyke drums; Then auld Guidman,
maist like to rive, “Bethankit!” ‘hums.

Haggis bombs; you can fling them at Burns suppers
Neeps and tatties, oh ma sticky hauns
Haggis bombs; you can fling them at Burns suppers
Neeps and tatties, oh ma sticky hauns
oh ma sticky hauns,
oh ma sticky hauns.

Haggis songs in Caledonia:
Ye cannae beat it, oh ma sticky hauns.
Haggis songs in Auchterader, oh ma sticky hauns,
oh ma sticky hauns,
oh ma sticky hauns,
oh ma sticky hauns.

from the album Scotland Calling by The Sensational Alex Salmond Gastric Band

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