O.C. Clause
(Mackay)
There's a man that everybody knows
He's famous for his reindeers and his ho ho hos
He lives in Lapland and he employs
Green wage slaves to make his toys
But they don't mind cos he's their mentor
And it's better than working in a call centre
He can't help it
He just can't help it
Obsessive, compulsive philanthropy
He can't help it
He just can't help it
He likes to give away stuff for free
He loves to dress in red and white
And he only ever goes out at night
Winter is his time of year
Spring and summer - he gets the fear
But the elves they love their spring break, maaan
They smear themselves in thick fake tan
What I don't get is who pays his wage
He's well past retirement age
And what will happen if he dies
Who's gonna drop the free stuff from the skies?
And I've tried to dance to jazz and hip hop
But I end up pogoing to Blitzkrieg Bop
I just can't co-ordinate my feet
To the complicated rhythm and the syncopated beat
(from the album Purple Reindeer)
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