I was walking down Pall Mall the other night
When my eyes beheld an eerie sight
I thought it was one of the undead
But it was Mohammed Al Fayed
said, 'Oi you!'
I said, 'Who, me?'
He said, 'I am not zombie,
Come with me and you will see The real Royal Family.'
he took me by the arm, which I thought was rather gallus
And we climbed over the fence at Buckingham Place
And we stared through the windows for a very long time
Then we saw Prince Philip Frankenstein
He was stalking the corridors shouting, 'Girls' and 'Feck'
He had two big bolts sticking out his neck
He shouts, he swears, he burps, he farts, he
like a fucking nazi
Prince Harry, he bashes him
He's a dedicated
follower of facsism
He's got a flag and a Kate Moss sticker
And an armband with a swastika
comes Queen Bess looking quite spectacular
Dripping blood like Countess Dracula
With all her corgis in single file
Being fed to the royal crocodiles
like they're the monstrous fourth Reich
We should've listened to David Icke
Although he said they were all lizards
Or was that Eddie Izzard?
the Monarchy Mash
They caused that crash
Al Fayed thinks they're aw fash
inspired by this
(from the album The New Sound , available from The Daily Reckless shop)
The Top 20