November 2018

Feartie

Originally written about David Cameron’s refusal to debate with Alex Salmond years ago, but relevant again today, now Theresa’s too feart to debate with Nicola Sturgeon.   The BBC they said to me Why do…


Granny On Bongos

  Well she lives all alone in a Manchester flat She wears Pringle jumpers and a floppy hat And her one aim in life is to be in The Fall Banging some bongos, she’s waiting…


Curmudgeon

  Curmudgeon Get off the phone Curmudgeon Go it alone Leave the hardy millenials To grow by themselves Play catch up on fibre book Like and share your instant grammes Curmudgeon Hey lazy hack Curmudgeon…


Einstein? Uh Go Go

  Einstein? Uh Go Go Einstein? Uh Go Go Einstein? Uh Go Go Donald says climate change Is a hoax and not man made Even so, come the judgement day I’ll be the one who’s…


She Conned Her Papa (Ivanka)

  What she did with her emails Is so criminal Is so dishonest Is so shocking She was willing to risk our foreign enemies reading her emails She lied a dog on her emails She…


Noel Edmonds Cancer Box

It’s No.1 It’s Top of the Pops It’s Noel Edmonds’ Cancer Box There’s a man with a plan And a helicopter and a gunge tank He’s mistra Noel He’s not weird, and his beard In…


Raking Bad

  The President of America met the President of Finland The President of America met the President of Finland Apparently they talked about raking the forest floor But one president said the other was just…