When the janny comes cleaning up again – Hurrah! Hurrah!
He’s coming with a bucket of sawdust yeah – Hurrah! Hurrah!
Cos someone was sick on the battlefield
The sweetcorn and vomit is congealed
It was in all of the papers – the indy civil war
It was all dreamt up in a meeting room – Hurrah! Hurrah!
When the boys from the press said We need more doom – Hurrah! Hurrah!
Their faces purple with delight
They said the proles will swallow any old shite
And blood and guts sells papers – it’s the indy civil war
There you are with your fife and drum – Hurrah! Hurrah!
And tackety boots and catapult – Hurrah! Hurrah!
But who’s in charge of the banana skins
Whose turn is it to take out the bins
When all that print is pulped in the indy civil war
We’re gonna need a musket amd a blunderbuss
Won’t you please crowdfund us?
Headlines made up by the subs – the indy civil war