It’s No.1
It’s Top of the Pops
It’s Noel Edmonds’ Cancer Box

There’s a man with a plan
And a helicopter and a gunge tank
He’s mistra Noel

He’s not weird, and his beard
In some circles is still revered
He’s mistra Noel

Deal or no deal’s just a hobby
He’s gonna bring back Mr Blobby
The apocalypse is zooming in
But never mind, here’s Keith Chegwin
And who is that he’s got with him?
Bloody hell, Maggie Philbin

Oh oh oh oh oh oh

Accentuate the positive
Exterminate the negative
He’s mistra Noel

Call the banker, call swap shop
It’s Noel Edmonds’ Cancer Box
He’s mistra Noel

from the album Tales From The Locker Room by The Jung Ones

based on this story