Entertainment


Handsome In The Half-Light

  When I passed you in the bedroom You didn’t give me a second glance I should’ve kept my socks on Or at least my pants You don’t seem to notice me at all Whatever…


Pearl Clutchers

  Pearl clutchers They are outraged and easily triggered Everything’s toxic Pearl clutchers God knows how they have lasted in this life My job is entertaining folks Singing songs and telling jokes And fucking swearing…


Awry

  There was a time I looked up to people Then I grew up and looked down on people Then I thought everyone was equal Except you and you and you and you Now everything’s…


Squint

  Lately, we’ve been going so crazy Lately, nothing seems to be going right So I just discovered a word I Never knew was just used in Scotland The word is squint, squint, squint Squint,…


Know Yer Rights

  This is a public service announcement With guitar Know your rights All three of them Number one You have the right to call out pettiness Stupidity is a crime! Whether it is done By…




Cowdenbeath Goth

  At Cowdenbeath Goth Friday domino winner Was Robbo Jock Moran was disqualified A sinner He chapped when he could play And wee Jimmy Izzat was grannied Wullie Smith had hard lines The rest o…


MYOFB

  Pixellated windae hingers Pixellated windae hingers Matt Haig gets threatened by a bampot Hounded off twitter in a hot shot By the eternally offended language polis Why don’t you mind your own fucking business…