Daily Reckless



Mary had a little chav
Its cap was burberry
But that's too bleeding obvious
Try something else, let's see...

It's baby Jesus time

Well I've been travelling all night long
I'm on my way to Bethlehem
Joseph's coming along
I'm on a donkey and I'm nine months gone

There was no room at the inn
Now I'm in a stable condition
But I'm really, really tired
I need to sleep but I'm totally wired

Wake me up before the donkey
I'm in labour and me legs are wonky
Mum and dad, they didn't want me
And Joseph's not the real dad
Don't tell me mam

Is that the three wise men I see?
I hope they've got me something nice like a Nintendo Wii
Or a 36 inch plasma
What's this frankincense and myrrh?

How does it work?
Where's the cable?
Is it Play Station compatible?

A wean in a manger
Nae drugs for ma head
They might've brought a litre of vodka instead


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Alex Salmond
Archbishop Desmond Tutu
Saviour Breath
Big John Smeaton
No More Smeaton
Campbell's Sauce
Noah Fucking Clue
Jenny Says
Where Seagulls Dare
Night, Thriller and Death
Wendy Alexander
I'm The Manse
Sic Transit Gloria Scotiae
You Absolute Cunt
The Thistle's Characteristics (Part 1)
The Barren Tree
We Don't Need To Share The Lavvy
Let's Eat
Greenhouse Girl
The Magnificent Folk Song
I Ride Bicycles
Talk About September 11
The Curry Song
Donald Trump
King of the Swingers (Perjury Mix)
Do The Loony Dook
In Recognition (Sean Connery Mix)
Hey Jude Law
Jeremy Paxman
No Cold Blooded Child
Jocko Euro
Monarchy Mash
Filling Out Forms
The New Sound
Bill Clinton's Havana
Hillary Clinton
Do The Necessary
I'm Dead
Hammer Time
John Prescott
Hughie Green's My Dad
David Icke & Tina Turner
Pond Life
Arthur Montford's Autograph
Britney's Got Tarrant
Whisky Galore In The Jar

Satan In The Body
Bye Bye Wendy
Mince & Tatties Qualitate
5000 Yobbos
I Can't Afford To Die Anymore
I Wish I Could Write A Serious Song
Egyptian Cream
March Of The Alcoholic Siamese Twins
Anything Ending With A 'Y'
To Be Frank
Perfect! Skint!
Alistair Darling
Crash Gordon vs Mandy
Dear Ringo
He's From Barcelona
A Frightfully Posh Halloween
Kerry Katona
The 80s
Forever In Hi-Vis
Charlie Is A Dalek
Thousands Of Racists Are Leaving Town
Float On (Pirate Mix)
Letter To Michael Jackson
No More Woolies
I'm Serious
Terrorist Medley
Only Shoes
King Of The Swingers (BB Edition)
Dedicated Follower of Fascism
Bendy Bus Song
Vatican Broadside (Treasury version)
Crazy Boris
Everybody's Heard About The Words
It's Mustard, Richard. Mustard!
Southerness Is Painless
Satellite Blow Up
Noel Yell
Scary Wee Boy

The Top 40

The Back Catalogue


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