The minute you walked in the joint I could see you were a man of destruction A real bellender Bad lookin’ unrefined Say, wouldn’t you like to know what’s goin’ on in our minds?…

  Wehhhhhhhlllllll…. I was minding my business Tousling my hair Then I decided to run the country It was worthwhile living a laughable life To set my eyes on that glittering prize Cos I’m thicker…

  I was watching bloody Newsnight, When I saw a Billy Bunter And he was a little old man ([Hello!]) In drab black and gray, chuckling away Well he trotted out the usual As he…

  Coup! Coup! Thur’s been a coup In yonder Westminster, a cunt’s Who’s Who It hasnae moved cos it’s still there noo I am the Boris goo ga choob Dorries is in rude health Every…

This little fat man who sold his soul I don’t want to be hacked I don’t think there’s ever been a president That’s done what we’ve done I wanna find a friendly reporter Are you…