New English National Anthem
Following Iran’s lead in not singing their national anthem at the World Cup in Qatar, it has been suggested that England adopt the Swiss Reckless Eurovision entry. Based on a tune by John Cage….
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Don’t Call Me A Bastard, I’m A Wanker
No more golden boots for dancing Yeah Show us the money Joe Lycett Don’t call me a bastard, I’m a wanker Kick it in the head, call the banker Benders liked Beckham But no…
Jimmy Hats
The tourist board sell Jimmy hats A tartan bunnet with ginger hair hanging out Oh, you wanna buy some Jimmy hats I blame Russ Abbot – he fills me with dread Cut off his…
Ukraine
There’s no place I’d rather be Outside of society You take my breath away Especially Kyiv, eh? Are you Euro’s heroes/zeros? Who knows? Ukraine What drives the people insane Is saying The Ukraine There’s…
Hibernian Dreaming And Heart Ache
Hibernian dreaming and Heart ache In Embra derby stakes With commentary from Pat Nevin Do we need Pat Nevin? I don’t really think so Standards of refereeing They’re falling weekly Easter Road or Tynie…
This Crisp Man
As the crisp shortage bites, we remember Mark E Smith’s name for Gary Lineker – Crisp Man. Gary Lineker On the telly desolate Will nature make a man of me yet? He’s in this…
Don’t Tell Kath
Don’t tell Kath, woa, woa The government’s havin a laugh, woa, woa They’ve led us up the garden path, woa, woa I am an Oz envoy at last They’ve got Tim Henman (c’mon Tim!)…
Fucking Dancing Horses
Olympics time Time to shine Fucking dancing horses, what is that all about? If I hear the word dressage again I’ll hurl First off it is boring Who the hell is scoring these jiggly…
Skelped
When you get to the Euros and get knocked out in the final It’s a long way back to the urinal When you realise that football isn’t coming home No no no Do you,…
Andy Murray
As Andy Murray battles through yet again, here’s an old cheesy classic from the archives: He’s eloquent and witty He’s a Scot and he’s a hibby Andy Murray Andy Murray He’s beaten Roger Federer And…