Diary – 1977


As you can see, I even went as far as designing my own cassette covers back then. Exhibiting all the artistic skills of a primary school child, it chimes with the DIY musical nonsense within. The cassette title refers to being under age for the pub. In 1977, I was 17 going on 18. Somehow I’d managed to torture my cassette recorder into a distortion effects pedal (probably by Spinal Tapping the volume on the tiny/tinny guitar amp I’d saved up for from my mum’s Freemans catalogue. Or it could have been the homemade amp that I’d borrowed from my mate Steve Graham, who had also fashioned some kind of fuzz pedal I seem to recall). Don’t expect any in-depth technical or sound engineering facts. Everything is fuzzy, including my remembrance of exact dates. All I can say is, hey, it was 1977, punk was all the rage, and the buzzsaw attack was all consuming.

Here’s all the tracks except for ‘Back Break Lover’, ‘Pimp’ , ‘Grown Up Wrong’ (Rolling Stones cover) and ‘Chaos’



God knows who this is about (if anybody), but if you, or anyone you know was around Glenrothes at this time, I can only apologise for the accusation of bestiality in the final verse. 

You got your hooks in me
You want a lot from me
But I can see through you
You got nothing for me at all

Well you just talk too loud
You’ve got to be in a crowd
So you can’t understand
Why I have to leave again

Without, with you
Without, with you
Without, with you
Sorry I can’t stay

You got your hooks in me

Please take your dog with you
I’m sure he needs you too
You seem to like him more
You can have more fun with him

You’d probably get on fine
You don’t need to learn how to whine

and here’s the unexpurgated original (skips and all):


NEW TOWN (Remastered)

The angst of being a teenage punk in one of Scotland’s new towns. Looks like I was disgruntled with the cooncil and knocked back by a girl wearing a leather jacket and chewing gum.

Well here in our nice new town
A box for a home
We tire of our daily job
For what? I don’t know

Don’t show me how life should be run
Can’t live it in a town with no fun
Can’t stick in the rut with the rest
Best get up, get out and get dressed

Complaints, I’ve got a few
But I can’t tell the council what to do
I ask you straight to your face
How can you spend all your time in this place

Down at the bowling alley
Little girls who think they’re funny
Chewing gum and leather jackets
All the sheep produced from packets

Original recording:


THIS IS THE LIFE (Remastered)

The first of many homages to London where I trained as a TV engineer and became besotted by the excitement of the big smoke.

This is the life, this is the way
I want to stay here for the day
Don’t you wanna come with me
Down to London, just to see
This is how we should live now
Live now

My holidays, your holidays
We want to drift into the ways

Take me on the water
Take me on the air
Take me on the land
I’m never, never, never there
Never, never, never there

Original recording:


CRAWL (Remastered)

Angst, anger and absurdity. See the last line.

Kiss your boots, of course I’d love to
I’ll roll the cigarettes just for you
Crawling on all fours towards you
You can take the money, course you can

Take it

Creeping Jesus, what a sucker
I love laughing while you crawling
See him beg to slave some more
On his back, arms on the floor

Crawl, crawl, crawl

Here’s some words to rhyme with crawler
Smaller, taller, caller, faller
1,2,3,4 what comes after
Maybe 5 or 1059
Crawl, crawl, crawl

Kiss your boots, of course I’d love to
1,2,3,4 what comes after

Crawl, crawl

If you don’t know what it means – tough shit

Original recording:


UNDER AGE (Remastered)

When we got chucked out of pubs. Exaggerated for poetic licence – as if I would nick a bottle of gin!

Let’s travel to town in a car
And we’ll park in reserved spaces
Let’s eat up the night before dark
And we’ll have us a ball

We walked in a bar, got a lot of strange looks
From the old straight men
They puffed on their pipes and they rattled their dominoes
A barman looked us in the face
You’re under age, you’re under age

He asked us for proof, we said none
So he threw us right out the door
We went right back in, knocked a bottle of gin from the bar
He really went mad and he dived for a phone
Someone held us back,
The older men supped on their dark brown ale
We waited for police, we did not wish for peace
So we just let loose
The blue boys were so in a rage
You’re under age, you’re under age

Original recording:


TAKING ME OVER (Remastered)

I’d obviously read Orwell by this time and keen to stress the point.

1,9,8,4, Ingsoc is really coming
Oh no, don’t say another bloody preacher

You taking me over
You taking me over

Political – you think you really are eh?
Another tedious bodily harm game

You taking me over
You taking me over

Ah, ah, ah, ah, you taking me over
Ah, ah, ah, ah, you taking me over
Ah, ah, ah, ah, you taking me over

I wanna hear an Enid Blyton record
This song you know is very intellectual
Glenrothes, boy that’s just another new town
I come from Kelso, just another old town

You taking me over
You taking me over

Ah, ah, ah, ah, you taking me over
Ah, ah, ah, ah, you taking me over
Ah, ah, ah, ah, you taking me over

Why not? Why?

I wanna read a Jimmy Osmond novel
I wanna see a Lord Harlech film
Her Royal Majesty on my calendar
She’s a pin-up girl!

Original recording:


SEVENTEEN (Remastered)

Must’ve been one of the first punk songs I did, shurely.

If you think about your life, you’re only going to be down
But if you think of what you like, you liking what you think now

Seventeen, don’t bring me down
I want to do what I want to now
Don’t stop me

When you’re not quite 18 yet, don’t want to get shoved around
You know more than what you think, adolescent mind

Original recording:


YOU LET ME DOWN (Remastered)

No punk album was complete without the token reggae track. So here’s my half-hearted effort.

You let me down
Once again
We warned you twice
So you’re to blame

You’re no good to us anymore
You’re no good to us anymore
You’re no good to us anymore

Look interested

Original recording:



So this is where my pun based parodies started. Amazed I never wrote Raeburn Heights instead of ‘all heights’

Last night I was drinking from a broken smoke stained glass
My mate, he was thinking about burning in the grass
When we’d finished talking, we we were half way there
Talking ’bout the pissed up drunkards heaven we have here

It’s so good getting pissed in the morning
Even better getting pissed at night
We just walk about the town feeling dizzy
And throw up from the top of all heights

When we’ve finished on the beer we’ll drink anything at all
Give us just a sniff of petrol and we’re pissing up the wall
Don’t bring those roll ups over here or we’ll never come to land
Let’s climb on the stage and sing with the band

Original recording:



My ability to embarrass has never dimmed with time.

Everywhere it’s just the same
No-one wants to take the blame
Try to act a fool sometimes
And no-one wants to know, they say

You’re really showing me up
You’re really showing me up
You’re really showing me up

Had a girl with half a brain
She said that I was just the same
As everybody else that layed her
So I told all her friends, she said

You’re really showing me up
You’re really showing me up
You’re really showing me up

I love to see you going red
I love to see you going red

Original recording:


FASHION (Remastered)

Peters, I’m assuming, was a ‘trendy’ boutique. Predates Bowie (ahead of my time again). Love the clumsy verse structure.

If it’s in Peters store window, then you’ll buy it
If it’s really dear you’re still going to try it
Cos everybody else is wearing it, you know you’ve got to get it
You don’t want to be different
You just want to look the same as your mate


I see that stripes and pale colours are in this week
Why can’t you think for yourself, turn the other cheek
Make your own T-shirts, don’t be dictated to by everybody else
I know you think if you look different
Your friends think you’re weird now


It’s all a fashion
It’s all a fashion
It’s all a fashion


Original recording:


NEW BOY (Remastered)

Whoah – acoustic guitar! Wrote this in 1976 and entered it for an NME song writing contest (pre punk). Lost to Roogalator. They returned the cassette with a fag burn on it.

Kevin went to see the city to find his future home
He never got his clothes so dirty, but his mind was clean
He got the train to Euston station, platform No.5
At the circus, he couldn’t believe his eyes

He sat beside a crowd of people gathering by the road
He liked to hear the young boys talking of what he didn’t know
He walked the streets that night till early in the darkened hours
He crawled back to the station to lie down

Let me show you all the sights tonight boy
Let me show you all the night

Oh where’ll you go now, you’re just another new boy lost
By the pace
And you’ll be lucky if you find somewhere to stay at night
Sleeping light

A lot of folk were talking about the young boy alone
He got a lot of offers from the hustlers and the whores
And when he had no money left – a favour for a queen
And there he stayed until he found a high

Original recording:


ON MY WAY (Remastered)

On my way to where? No clue. I do remember that shed where we cast spells though.

Remember little Paula
Sure I do
Dancing im the hall
Sure I do

And Friday nights and love bites by the corner in the light
I’ll never forget you
And walking home by the longest route, cutting gently through the grass
Moving softly up the pass in the hallway

On my way
There’s the forest by the river
On my way
Train’s window’s like a mirror
On my way

And casting spells down in the shed where we hid away for fun
I’ll never forget you
We ran the risk of getting caught and of course we always did
And the car would always skid down the mud track
Into the haystacks on the farm

On my way
On my way
On my way

Original recording: