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Only You Guys

  Who can nick your rights and now say everything’s alright They’ve brought them back again to tell you you’re our bestest friend Only you guys, only here Oh, oh, oh, oh Oh only you…


Katy Tried

  Katy tried She was halfway crucified She was on the other side Of no tomorrow She walked in And her life began again Then it turned into disaster And to sorrow So she’s gone…


Douglas Useless

Celtic fans have spoken. Well, hello, my name is Douglas Douglas Useless I am the new Scottish Tory boss The only thing that people know about me Is that I hate gypsies and I am…


We Are The Undead

“Nobody has ever committed a crime after being executed,” says Tory deputy chairman, Lee Anderson.  We beg to differ. Reminds us of the soundtrack from the zombie football film, Wraith Rovers… Walking home through Beveridge…


Leo Slayer

Leo meets Slayer…   You’ve got a cute way of talkin’ You got the better of me Just snap your fingers and I’m walkin’ Like a dog hangin’ on your lead I’m in a spin,…


Anthea Turner’s Cock

Runner up in the Songs In The Key Of Laugh competition 2022. “We know it’s a little puerile, but it’s just so daft and so well timed…we’ve listened to all these songs so many times…



The Diary Of A Musical Nobody

Glenrothes 1977 – 1984. What really went on there? Unearthed recordings reveal never before heard songs from one of the forgotten nobodies of the once thriving Fife underground punk and post-punk scene. Start reading and…


Cheesy Peeps

  Commentators from an Arbroath Dunfermline match, set to ‘The Breakdown’ by Rufus Thomas. see also: Away For A Jobby At Half Time (My Shit) Reckless Football Club Anthems