Jellyfish Johnson
For a while, the BBC knew what to do Setting up an interview With Andrew Neil on their side We thought we knew what was true For a while, we paid no mind to…
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Hey Jo
Hey Jo, where you goin’ with that cheque in your hand? Hey Jo, I said where you goin’ with that cheque in your hand? Alright I’m gonna take the SNP to court You know…
I Get So Drunk I Don’t Know Who I’m Voting For
I get so drunk I don’t know who I’m voting for I’m plastered in the polling booth and pissing on the floor I appreciate it’s probably against electoral law But I get so drunk…
Their Mummies All Told Them They’re Clever
If you’re Andrew Bridgen and you have to defend Jacob Rees Mogg and your other thick friends You are all of you fighting over one brain cell If there is any justice, then you’ll…
Gie Us Some Peace
Everybody’s talking about The government regiment, vehement management Embarrassment in Parliament Postponement entanglement Impeachment excrement Stick it up your fundament All we are saying is gie us some peace All we are saying is…
The Declaration Of Arbroath
It’s about time we had another national holiday Christmas, Easter and New Year are so passé The 6th of April sounds good to me When Bernard of Kilwinning tried to set us free He…
No Smacking, No Fracking, No Union Jacking
S.C.O.T.L.A.N.D Massive heart, wee country Reject the landlord, reject the laird Celebrate John Logie Baird And Alexander Graham Bell I could make a list like Billy Joel But that would be just too cringey…
Technology Lessons
Your mattress will monitor your nightmares Your fridges will beep for more cheese We’ll be culled by pink-eyed terminators And limbless chickens will run free You’ll see It’s the future according to me I…
Stop Prorogation
Stop prorogation In the name of the supreme court Boris, Boris, I’m aware of what you do Each time you hear a ‘Boo!’ I know you’re in No.10 Meeting your other love again But…
Swinson (Starry Starry Eyed)
Starry starry eyed Paint your palette blue and gray Wash those liberal tears away From eyes that know the darkness in your soul Further your career Invite more tories in, don’t hear Just how…