Wimborne resident Robert Fripp
Attempted to woo my mother
By buying her a Babycham
Apparently she didn’t know what to do with the cherry
An incident that clearly rankled
As she still mentions it
Some six decades hence

She eventually dumped him
As he was always playing his guitar
And unlike my old man
Didn’t have a motorbike
It’s a mystery

Fripp is now married to Toyah Wilcox
And my older brother once accosted them at a festival
Reminding the prog rock leviathon
Of this teenage dalliance
With our parent to be

Quick as a flash
In his Dorset burr
Fripp replied, ‘How’s your uncle Kelvin?’
‘He’s OK, thanks.
How are the whippets?
Do you still see much of David Sylvian?’

from the forthcoming new album by Half Bam Half Whisky. Coming Soon. 

words: Steve Hill from his book Friday Night Fever

see also:

The Half Man Half Biscuit Song

I Was A Teenage HP Lovecraft Fan