Articles by Tommy Mackay



Sir Kid Starver

  Submission with Keir Starmer, Laura Kuenssberg, Susanna Reid, The Sex Pistols and Bill Grundy. see also: 5000 Yobbos Tony Blair’s Mortgage Advisor


I Want What Can Be

by The Marxist & Luciferian Orchestra with Bow Wow Wow feat. Kamala Harris   “What can be, unburdened by what has been.” see also: Hurry Up Harris  


Hurry Up Harris

  Come on come on Hurry up Harris come on Come on come on Hurry up Harris come on We’re going down the pub We’re going down the pub … Come on come on Hurry…


D.U.M.B.

  Gabba gabba we accept you. We accept you. One of us.  Gabba gabba we accept you. We accept you. One of us. Gabba gabba hey. Gabba gabba hey. see also: There’s A Shark Person,…


Hear Emily Play

  When Emily met Kari and Nigel in America. Warning: contains nuts and Hot Chocolate. see also: See Emily Maitlis Precious Jewish Space Lasers


Torrance Frayed

  Inspired by the bizarre spectacle of half the Rolling Stones mixing with Peter Cook and Dudley Moore with the golfer Sam Torrance grinning over their shoulders, here’s a stramash-up of all those gentlemen. see…


Donald’s Shoes

  In an assassination attempt Try not to look unkempt Or duck Stand up, stand up Stand up! If you’ve just had your ear pierced It’s important to look fierce As fuck Stand up, stand…


Garth Gravy

  When Garth was in Buzzcocks, no-one was safe. Not even the gravy. “You’re all suffering from a bunch of fucking cowards!” see also: Right Noise Rhynchokinesis