Katy Tried
Katy tried She was halfway crucified She was on the other side Of no tomorrow She walked in And her life began again Then it turned into disaster And to sorrow So she’s gone…
Politics
Just Say Yes
We’ve got a vote in the refererendum We’ve got a lot of meetings and we’re gonnae attend ’em And if we make mistakes then we’ll make an addendum – yeah We’re gonnae stand on…
Ziggy Sturgeon
People stared when she joined the SNP Everybody called her a nippy sweetie But Nicky rose above them at the referendum And re-invented herself as Ziggy Sturgeon She wasn’t on the right She wasn’t…
Douglas Useless
Celtic fans have spoken. Well, hello, my name is Douglas Douglas Useless I am the new Scottish Tory boss The only thing that people know about me Is that I hate gypsies and I am…
You’re Really Showing Me Up
Everywhere it’s just the same No-one wants to take the blame Try to act a fool sometimes And no-one wants to know, they say You’re really showing me up You’re really showing me up…
Sic A Parcel O Rogues
Sic a parcel o rogues in a nation Sic a parcel o rogues in a nation Sic a pa pa pa pa pa pa pa pa pa Sic a parcel o toads in a…
No Particular Thing To Say
Riding shotgun in my car Doing a piece to camera Can you imagine the way I felt I didn’t put on my seat belt But it is fine, they won’t fine me I’ve no…
Liars Wahey!
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh Look out liars and you highlife scum Who gotta keep your victims poor and dumb, and dumb, and dumb Your motives and methods are not disguised By spin, or soap or smiling lies,…
You Should Be Hi-Financing
If you’re in a homeless shelter And haven’t got a bean I’ve got a plan to help ya Using trigonometry What you doin’ in a food bank? Ah What you doin’ in a food…
Baroness 4 Life
As Lady Mone takes a gardening break from the House Of Lords, here’s the time she boasted she was a Baroness for life. Tories gave me power But I still sell shit on QVC…