Here In Scotland

To celebrate the release of a new Sparks album, here’s my Caledonian version of Here In Heaven:

Here, there are lots of things to do
And panoramic views
Of countryside completely surrounding you

And here there’s plenty Labour tears
You’re never getting back, never, never
Basically, I guess it could be worse
Yes, I do suppose it could be worse

Here, there are many, many sheep
And a lot of folk asleep
But their hearts are in the right places underneath their ribs
And we don’t need Labour
Saying people ‘up there’ – you haven’t learned a thing
Jess Phillips won’t break our little pact
Jess Phillips, don’t bother coming back

Up here in Scotland without you
Up here in Scotland without you
Up here in Scotland without you
It must be Hell knowing your ignorance will keep you out of here
For years and years and years

Meh, do you even really care
What’s happening ‘up there’
Do we qualify as equals or an annoying neighbour
Those whinging sweaty jocks
Let’s beat them like a fox in a kimono
Push the button, if that’s what you want
It’s only us that will be blown to kingdom come

Up here in Scotland without you
Up here in Scotland without you
Up here in Scotland without you
It must be Hell knowing your arrogance will keep you out of here
For years and years and years

Second thoughts, will that ever happen?
Second thoughts, will you ever have them?
Second thoughts, get into the sea
Second thoughts, for eternity, for eternity, for eternity

Up here in Scotland without you
Up here in Scotland without you
Up here in Scotland without you
It must be Hell knowing that your fear will keep you out of here
For years and years and years

 

with apologies to Sparks

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