Dominic Cummings has been hired to help run No.10
So who is the divisive figure playing a key role in the government’s Brexit strategy?
From Smurfland where we belong
You don’t seem to know whether you’re trying to ask me questions
Or whether to interrupt all the time
No, we Smurf, it’s much less fuss

This clown, what’s he like, eh?
We are real Smurfs so we don’t care
What did I just say?
Yes, we will sing it once again

Cummings!
If you were in my job now what would you do?
You do an eclectic celebration of the dance!
You do Fosse, Fosse, Fosse!
You do Martha Graham, Martha Graham, Martha Graham!
Or Twyla, Twyla, Twyla!
Or Michael Kidd, Michael Kidd, Michael Kidd, Michael Kidd!
Or Madonna, Madonna, Madonna!

Let’s take back control, let’s take back control
I don’t have a masterplan
Well people say all sorts of things
You say all sorts of things
You don’t know what you’re talking about
So everyone watching at home should know
Don’t watch the news
Cos it’s almost all bull
Another clueless journalist
Let’s take back control, let’s take back control

Yes, we smurf through a water tap
The prime minister can speak for himself
Yes and through a small keyhole

You don’t even know the basics of the subject you’re asking about
Smurfing the flute, we think’s so cute
You’re talking like a toddler
Yes, but only to this tune

Let’s take back control, let’s take back control
All government’s obey the law or they try to
The prime minister will make clear what he’s going to do at the right time
Yes, sir!

Did you see what he just did?
What did he do?
He blew a bubble with his gum while I was singing.
You can’t do that while I’m singing!

This is a complex number
Full of mythic themes

I don’t think I get it

But you keep it all inside

I didn’t say that, did I?

 

from the album The Great Dominic Swindle