Pearl clutchers
They are outraged and easily triggered
Everything’s toxic

Pearl clutchers
God knows how they have lasted in this life
My job is entertaining folks
Singing songs and telling jokes
And fucking swearing

Pearl clutchers
On all sides of the political spectrum
Are offended

Pearl clutchers
Think that any old swears are abusive
Anyone who says vile or woke
They just give me the dry boak, so disingenuous

They must know everything’s unstable
But still they sit there at their tear stained table
Dreaming of the things they never get to do
Deluded and divided boo hoo hoo

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