Sex was invented in Scotland
In case you didn’t know
By Microbachius Dicki
It was a little tricky
But they did it very well

Oh what a glorious nation
We invented copulation
A fish, not a crustacean
Having sexual relations

In a loch, of all locations
It was quite a sensation
The beginning of creation
In a sideways gyration

Well, you ask Microbachius Dicki
If it ended up sticky
He’s not big but he’s a thicky
Microbachius Dicki
And he did it very well