I’m the dour Scotsman that you’re too scared to mention
I spent your cash on banking gash
And nuclear deterrents
The devil take your principles
And socialist intentions
You’re all a bunch of bigots
And I’ve fucked up all your pensions

Stand and deliver
Your money or your life
I’ll screw you over
I’m from fucking Fife

I’m the dowdy Scottishman so sick of Tony’s fashions
The hand gesture, the plastic smile
That people think so dashing
I nicked them all but still you hate me
It’s obvious I’m faking
It’s kind of shit to tell the kids
The big mistake they’re making

Stand and deliver
Your money or your life
I’ll screw you over
I’m from fucking Fife

Me and Mandy have your soul
Your pension will be mine
All mine

Gaffe gaffe, I did a little gaffe gaffe
I did a little gaffe gaffe
I did a little gaffe gaffe

 

from the album Gordon Brown Sings Political Ballads. Listen here