“Sumthin’s about to go down”

“M-m m-m m-m m-m m-m
Mummify your ass now
M-m m-m m-m m-m m-m
Mummify your ass”

“I’m a flight attendant
I’m a flight attendant
That means I attend the flight”

“Sometimes our job has us attending to crazy people
If you push us too far you gonna have to attend this ass whooping.”

“You see, because on this particular flight
I’m sitting in the jump seat
And I’m just looking at him
At the damn fool
He spittin’ and cussin’ and goin’ crazy.
I say, ‘That’s enough!'”

You’ve got that touch so gentle and sweet
But you’ve got that look so cryptical
Can’t talk to you babe, you know I get so weak
Sometimes I think that love is just mythical

“I got up and I walked over there.
And by the way this man smelled like:
A pack of Marlboro cigarettes,
A full shot of Everclear alcohol.
And regret.
So I know sumthin’s about to go down.
At this point he’s touching all over my co-worker’s breasts.”

Starbright, starbright, you’ve got the lovin’ that I like
Turn this crazy bird around
Should not have got on this flight tonight

“And where he fucked up at
Is when he touched my titties
Cos I don’t play there.

So what I did is I took out the duct tape.
I said ‘cch ccch’
He got scared
He started stuttering
Saying ‘h-h-hold up
‘W-w-w-wait a minute
Somethin’ ain’t right.’

I said. ‘Yeah, we’re about to
M-m m-m m-m m-m m-m
Mummify your ass now, boy.’
So we wrapped him up.
Prrrrrppphh.
Better than any Christmas present you ever seen.

He won’t be coming on no more Frontier flights
At all.”

They’re singin’, “Goodbye baby
Baby bye-bye
Ooh! Love is blind”

Up go the flaps, down go the wheels
Hope you got your heat turned on, baby
Hope they’ve finally fixed your automobile
Hope it’s better when we meet again, babe

Starbright, starbright, you’ve got the lovin’ that I like
Turn this crazy bird around
Should not have got on this flight tonight
Should not have got on this flight tonight