Looking After The One Show
I am on the One Show I’m wearing my best shoes My husband Arthur Askey Is on the couch with me too This is now what passes For political insight Jobs for the boys and…
Entertainment
The Eejit
This is the story… Iggy Pop moves to Scotland where he annoys the neighbours by playing loud music at night. After a disastrous spell playing left back for Cumbernauld Town, he goes on the rampage…
First We Take Lumphinnans
Speed hovercraft like a bird on the wing Over the Forth to Fife We’re coming over to absolve your sins And spice up your dreary life First we take Lumphinnans Then we take Leven We’ve…
With My Little Schtick Of Post-Punk Rock
Every now and then you’ll see in the zeitgeist, the post punk revival come around. I don’t care if I can’t play guitar, my uke is more profund. See me chop like the Gang…
It’s Turned Out Shite Again
George Flambé presents a brand new album of ukulele delights. Available here.
I’ve Never Seen An Advert In The Daily Reckless
(with apologies to John Cooper Clarke) I’ve seen the poison letters of the unionist hacks About the yellow peril and the reds and the blacks And the SNP and its treacherous acts Empire two…
Let’s Flounce
Hey baby if you’ve had enough Or you’re Huckleberry Hounded off Let’s flounce Let’s flounce Do the instagram and the facebook too Unfortunately you don’t qualify for Who’s Who Let’s flounce Let’s flounce Dramatic…
Dirty Washing
Album from The Foul featuring out-takes and instrumentals from The Fall with new lyrics. Available here.
Bagpipe Music
by Louis MacNiece It’s no go the merrygoround, it’s no go the rickshaw, All we want is a limousine and a ticket for the peepshow. Their knickers are made of crepe-de-chine, their shoes are made…
I’ve Never Seen A Straight Banana
I’ve seen a lesbian kiwi fruit Got a bisexual pomegranate to boot But I’ve never seen a straight banana. Well, I’ve been to the end of the street and back And I own six…