Terrorist Friend
Ooh you made me live Never mind the magic money tree It’s you the DUP Ooh you saved my skin now honey Ooh you made me live Ooh you’re the best friends that I ever…
Politics
Scotland Calling (Corbyn version)
Scotland calling to the faraway lands We know what we’re doing, we’re wiping our hands Scotland calling to the Labour conference Don’t think you can talk down to us Scotland calling, now don’t look…
Fields Of Wheat
Between Boris and Donald Trump Between a clown and a cunt All of the arms that have been sold To Saudis for a pot of gold The cold dead eyes that never cry That let…
Looking After The One Show
I am on the One Show I’m wearing my best shoes My husband Arthur Askey Is on the couch with me too This is now what passes For political insight Jobs for the boys and…
Strong And Stable
Strong and stable, strong and stable, I’m your mum, I’m your mum. Let me sell your health care, let me sell your health care, don’t live long don’t live long Strong and stable Strong…
Caledonia Uber Alles
I am Governor Jerry Brown Nicola Sturgeon was in town We slagged off the president… Sturgeon has no demands She won’t shake Trump’s tiny hands But he dictates how this is seen He’ll call…
Stickers On A Statue
D’you ever seem to have one of those days where nationalism’s just not doing it for you anymore? Well you know, I used to have those just about all the time. But I found a…
Wightman In Holyrood Parly
Who Owns Scotland The aristocracy who came before us They handed it all down and divvied it all up But the poor had no lawyers Lords and conglomorates Scooping up all the acres We’re…
Now Is Not The Time
We were on the cliff edge and Theresa May says Rollover Willie, Ruth and Kez, Theresa May sez Rollover So they all rolled over but Nicola said No So Theresa May said Now is…
Sadiq Khan
Sometimes it’s hard to be the Mayor of London I can’t imagine what it’s like in Scotchland I’m not saying your racists Well, not to your faces But really that’s the gist of my cunning…