I Saw Mommy Nicking Sanitisers
I saw Mommy nicking sanitisers From the shelves in Boots on the high street She didn’t see me creep Up the aisle to have a peep She thought I was in WH Smith Buying…
Articles by Tommy Mackay
I Touch My Face
I wash my hands following government guidelines Singing God Save The Queen 54 times I miss out ‘Rebellious Scots to crush’ I can’t find anti-bacterial handcream in Lush Oh I’m a complete disgrace And…
Michael Portillo’s Red Chinos
Always on TV, on another journey Michael Portillo’s red Chinos Off on a train, again and again Michael Portillo’s red Chinos I even saw them in Fife, heading up to Dundee It’s not top…
Stairs Going Up To The Bedrooms
Here’s Dion Dublin saying “stairs going up to the bedrooms” backed by a dance version of the William Tell Overture by the Electronica Techno Orchestra. Just because. Word compilation by @discokidnap.
Waiting For Life
Existentialism Is doing my head in All this time I have been Waiting for life to begin Pick another ism Comic communism Singing from Sing Sing Waiting for life to begin A collection of…
Filling Out Forms
Dear Mr Brown, I see you are down as a Jedi Are you really sure? Also it says your colour is beige Occupation: extracting urine And next to Sex it says ‘Please’ Hereditary illness:…
Where I Live
I used to live in Hope But I moved out last year It was very nice But now I live in Fear Which is not so nice But it has a park Where I…
Mexborough Miner
Scream if you’re going past Doncaster Mexborough miner Mexborough miner Mexborough miner Oh oh oh I knew a Mexborough miner He was funny, well kinda Dirty job, filthy one liners A huge influence on…
Laughtivism – the album
A brand new album for 2020. From the T to the O to the M to the M to the Y. From the M.A.C to the K to the A to the Y. On Spotify…
In The Name Of Jesus!
As rabid eugenicist, Andrew Sabisky resigns, more volunteers come forward for Dominic Cummings’s barmy army… From the album Questionable Times by Half Bam Half Whisky. Listen here