Jackie Bird
OK boys, give us one of them Reporting Scotland couthy, homely wee country vibes Haud oan to yer Auntie Beeb’s pinny Ah wella everybody’s seen Jackie Bird Bird, Bird, Bird Jackie Bird Look at…
Articles by Tommy Mackay
Julian Assange
Julian Assange Julian Assange He says the world is ruled by a giant blancmange He has all the secrets Revealing all the lies He told me that there was no mince in my mince…
Riddy
Riddy, What a riddy, Theresa’s croaking Like a dalek, it never ends And EU are making you croak It’s a pure riddy The first time that you had a vote You were trounced but…
The McBots
It’s #NationalUnicornDay. Deploy the unicorn! We are Scottish Nationalists Manipulating through our wrists We are the McBots We are the McBots We are the McBots (dissolve the union) We are the McBots (deploy the unicorn)…
Let me tell you about my new LP
“A lot of people have been asking me about my new LP. Well, here it is, pop-pickers. It features lots of stirring tunes including Caravan Of Leave, Making Placards For Nigel and These Boots Won’t…
The Cancer, My Friend, Is Blowing In The Wind
How many times must a windmill spin Before it turns on my TV How many times have I told you My dad was born in Germany How many oranges must I sook To go…
It’s Raining Contempt
As sewage pours into the House of Commons and Uri Geller claims credit, we ask – is this a sign? Or just a burst pipe? Humility is rising, Theresa’s getting low According to…
Mark Francois
Hi, my name is Mark Francois, (you’re hard, you’re hard) Behold my genitalia (my genitalia) My name sounds like it is French (Francois, Francois) But it’s not, I am hench A sweaty bulldog in…
They Shoot Horseshit Don’t They?
Here we go Round and round the floor Together in shite Pure bullshit Over bloody Brexit Whatever This time Theresa and Jeremy We should put them out of their misery Whatever It’s time They…
Walking Bollock Naked In The Ochils
As protesters make their mark on the glass panels at Westminster, the Reckless uses it as an excuse to recall a 2013 news story about a chap spotted walking bare naked scuddy in the…